Writing is a series of ups and downs.
This week was a “down.” I received results from the Golden Rose and the Golden Gateway contests where I was a finalist. “Gold” is evidently not good for Murphy’s Law. As I’ve said in previous posts, there’s a “love it or hate it” feel for the beginning of that manuscript. Since I didn’t win either competition, I am very disappointed — especially after so many fantastic comments from judges in both contests. Ah, well. I sent it into Golden Heart as a sign of my assertiveness and my faith in myself as a writer. I have no expectations of being a finalist.
School is going well. I suppose as one part of my life falls, another rises in some sort of odd cosmic balance. A local news station is coming to cover a big lab that, with the help and expertise of our school’s AP biology teacher, Becky Kehler, I hold for my AP students. The woman is a dynamo. She was Indiana’s Biology Teacher of the Year last year. I admire her greatly, and I’m pleased we can work together on this project. We pull together all of my advanced psychology students and her advanced biology students for an “in-house” field trip. Then the students participate in three labs, including dissection of sheep brains. It was a big success last year, and with the changes we’ve made, it should be even better this year.
I sometimes wish I had the confidence in my writing that I do in my teaching. Hopefully, time will help me develop some, just as it has in my classroom abilities. I believe my stories are good, sometimes even great. It’s just so frustrating to final so many manuscripts in so many contests and not win one. 
Ah, well. I’ll keep working on improving and have faith in my Critters and my on-line partner. They tell me I’m good, and none of them have any problem with telling me when my stories aren’t cutting it. And I thank them from the bottom of my heart for that honesty.
Hopefully, next week will be an “up” week. 
Sandy beats too hard on herself and I’m here to tell everyone — her writing is wonderful, her story lines are unique and her characters are full of depth, believability and make the readers become involved in their lives. Getting a final placing in a contest isn’t easy — it’s definitely something to be crowing proud about and a placing in a contest is exactly the same. Pull up your confidence boots, Sandy…you are a writer…an excellent writer!!!
Judie
Judie — have I ever told you what a great friend, mentor, and all around wonderful person you are?? Thanks for the kind words. I’ll take them to heart.
Sandy said, “I sometimes wish I had the confidence in my writing that I do in my teaching.”
Don’t we all. I think that’s part of the creative artist psychology. When I was in college, I came across a psychology book while researching for a paper. They had followed a large group of people from birth into late middle age (whatever that is). At birth they gave them EEGs to record brain waves and they found that the babies who later went on to become creative artists of any type (art, drama, writing, music) had a much greater percentage of a certain type of brain signal that causes negative thoughts, the kind that cause self doubt and depression. They said that signal flashed through their brains at a much higher rate (something like 4-8 times as often). As those babies grew older, their psychological profiles showed them to be less confident, more depressed, etc. Obviously the babies weren’t actually thinking, “I suck” or anything, so why did those “negative thought” brain waves flash through their brains constantly? They didn’t know. Like everything else, they figured it was mostly genetic.
The experiment said the percentage of suicide was much higher for the creative artists, even the highly successful ones, and they felt it had to do without those brain waves, rather than life circumstances. That made me think of the Barrymores family–many talented actors and a high incidence of suicide.
For those lucky writers who don’t suffer from self doubt (I don’t like them), let’s just say they’re not as creatively artistic as we are!
What an interesting way to look at it!! I’ve always taught about left and right hemispheres of the brain and their influences on creativity, but I’d never seen this information before. Fascinating…
You and I will have to remain the “unlucky” writers who do suffer self-doubt. On the other hand, complacency just isn’t a part of my personality, nor do I expect it’s part of yours. We both work too hard at our craft.